As usual I went to my roof in the early morning. It was still not morning as it was 4.30 am. It is a pleasant experience to be under the vast sky and finding trees and various plants around me at that time. People, still in their deep sleep leave me to feel alone in that calm world. The most beautiful thing is to feel that the dawn wakes up gradually as if to create a world still half hidden in the dark of night. Like the child Krishna who had in his ankles the bells which jingled sweetly as he walked –the dawn steps in with the calls of birds. The air suddenly becomes fragrant with the fragrance of the trailing robe of the dawn.
Yesterday the air was slightly wet as there were clouds in the east. The touch of the air was felt very soothing on the cheeks. The early morning was very soft-like that of a loving heart. I was watering the tiny plants that were in the flower-pots. It is my regular work. I looked around me and saw the tops of trees and of a few tall buildings. As I was looking to all of them I suddenly dropped in the depth of my seeing eyes. I felt that I knew them as I knew my eyes. Is seeing a function to know others? Seeing seemed to be creating! They came up from the centre of my existence and as I felt my body as my own –they also were I. They were even more intimately known to me than I knew my arms or feet. Even breathing was more artificial than seeing. Was I actually seeing or in a different mode of experience? I felt an intense urge to melt down in all I see around me. But still the mind was active only as interference to a beautiful discovering process. So I tried to know the relation between the world and me. How this world is poised in me-was a seeking –the remnant of mental obstinacy was there. All of a sudden the world threw me out in its peripheries as one of the many separately existing beings in its kingdom. But just before my fall it dawned in me that the relation of this world with me was laid in the consciousness of a unity. The trees, the birds, the flowers....all were ramifications of a single oneness. Perhaps it exists in an unspecified centre in me.
3 April 2009
The world and I
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